In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus. So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation.
1 Peter 5:10
My last blog post was in December. On the Friday before Christmas, I got a call from Erin, the lung transplant nurse, telling me the committee had met and they wanted to list me. She said they needed insurance approval and she should have that on that very day, or by the day after Christmas for sure. Both days came and went without a call. The committee meets every Friday, so I thought surely that I would recieve a call the Friday after Christmas. Nope. The next week was New Year's, and most certainly I would get that call the day after New Year's day. No? Perhaps the Friday after New Year's Day? No. I called my insurance and found out that they sent approval on December 18th. What????? The financial coordinator at Vanderbilt told me that the issue was that Vanderbilt is out of network for lung transplants, and they were working with the underwriters for my insurance company on a contract. Apparently this is not an unusual procedure, and it can take weeks.
Weeks? Let me tell you why this was so very upsetting to me. When I had the transplant evaluation, I asked if I could wait to be listed until after the mission trip in January. (The mission trip to the Dominican Republic is my passion.) I was told no, because of the antibody situation. They did not want me to take a chance of missing an offer as finding lungs for me will be so challenging. Only one set of lungs out of every 100 that match my blood type and size will be a match for me.
The longer I waited for that call, the more confused and frustrated I became. Had I known it would be so close to the dates of the trip, I would never have backed out. Did I make the wrong decision? Was God telling me to go ahead and book a flight the week before the team was scheduled to leave? I was angry when I realized that I might not hear anything until after the trip- I could have gone!!!
Wednesday of this week I was so upset that I texted my fellow faculty members going on the trip. Here are some pictures of the faculty from previous years- dear friends that I have had the privilege of serving with.
I told them that I knew my request was selfish, but I needed their prayers. I asked them to pray that the call would come on Thursday or Friday, so that I would not second guess my decision. I was not in a hurry to be listed- I just wanted confirmation. Of course they sent encouraging reponses, but more importantly, they prayed.
On Friday, we had a faculty meeting to go over the final details for the trip via teleconference between Jackson and Hendersoville. The meeting was emotional for me, but I got through it. I disconnected the online link, and as I was closing my laptop, my phone rang. It was Erin. I do not recall what she first said to me, but it was not about listing. I looked at my colleagues and shook my head. Then I heard her say that the insurance contract had come through, and she asked me if I wanted to be listed! There was not a dry eye in the room. We were all overcome by the significance of the timing. The amazing thing was not that I was added to the list, but rather God's confirmation through that phone call. I was sure I was in just the place he wanted me to be at that moment in time.
Erin called back an hour later to let me know all the paperwork had been processed and I was active on the list. I told her about the timing of her call, and how it was not a coincidence. She replied "Every time I call you, you make me cry."
That said, I must also admit that my heart is breaking. This is the first January since 2009 that I have not spent a week on a life changing trip to the Dominican Republic. It feels like home there, and the wonderful missionaries, translators, and pastors we work with there are like family. I have had the privilege of coordinating the trip since its inception. I love watching how God works in each person during the week, and I have many wonderful memories.
The children are so loving - and well behaved!
This is one of the small churches we serve in.
Beautiful people!
Pastor Miguel. We love to serve in his church in Quisqueya!
Even memories of long flight delays are sweet- well, they seem sweet two years later.
I am grieving the loss of this opportunity. Hold on a minute- I know most of you are thinking that I should be happy I am on the transplant list, and that God has better plans for me, etc. Yes, I know all that, but I am still sad. God knows. He gave me a heart for missions and for the Dominican Republic, and he made me human. I believe it is okay to admit how I feel. Still, I am trusting him. I know that my place is not in the Dominican Republic this week, but my heart will be there. Perhaps the call for lungs will come. I may never know the reason I am not going. I just have to be obedient.
This is my suitcase, sitting in the attic. It should be packed and waiting by the back door. As difficult as this week will be, it would have been even worse had I not recieved the call. What a testimony!
This morning, some of the students met me on campus to move luggage downstairs.
We have 35 bags of supplies, which includes 300 Spanish Bibles that were donated by the BSN class of 2018. The baggage handlers are going to hate us- 35 bags of supplies plus 50 checked bags for team members- 85 bags! Pray that they all get there.
As we arrived home, the postal carrier was delivering a box. It was the box of Donate Life items from Ashleigh-Anne. Can you believe the timing? God is so good. He is giving me just what I need when I need it.
I went to campus to help load the bus. In the cold dark night, I tried to memorize the smiles and excitement on the sweet faces of the students. Here I am talking to the group before they depart. I may or may not have ugly cried.
This is my good friend and colleague Dr. Patsy Crihfield. We always room together on the trip. You can always find candy and snacks in our room. Plenty of chocolate and cherry sours!
This is one of the saddest sights I have ever had to see- the tail lights of the bus.
I felt as if the breath was sucked from my chest. The bus took my heart with it.
What a wonderful week they will have. Pray for safety, for good health, and for God to work in and through this team for his glory. I can't wait to hear all about it!
